My story is probably like countless other women’s out there, and that relating is what makes the sharing so important.  If we’re all going through this, to some degree, why not figure it out together, right?

I never worried about weight as a kid, even into my early teens.  In fact, I ate pretty much whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, in truck driver quantities.  I like food. A lot. I’m often planning my dinner at breakfast.  I pin recipes and meal ideas on ”Pinterest” like nobody’s business.  I grew up in a family where events were focused on delicious foods and where comfort was often found in my favourite treats.

The problem started when I was about sixteen years old, I guess. I gained a bunch of weight that year, probably for a variety of reasons, such as alcohol consumption, less activity, home life, hormones, teen angst, and just eating whatever I felt like when the mood struck.  I struggled with that weight gain (about 20 lbs) until I was 18 years old and lost it all and more by running around a sprawling University campus.

I met my future husband the next year and stayed pretty fit for many years after that.  Even at my “lowest” weight, I was always thinking I should lose another 10 lbs or take a smaller size. Oh, to have that weight again! What’s that saying? “If I could only be as skinny as I was when I used to think I was fat?”  Something along those lines. You get the idea.

I’m an Early Childhood Educator and once I started working in daycare centers, the real trouble began. I would snack when the kids had snacks, plus what I ate at home. I definitely was NOT watching what I was eating or finding the time to get much exercise in my daily routine. The weight started creeping on pretty quickly. Some people say it’s impossible to gain 5 lbs in a week, well, I’m here to tell you if anyone can do it, it’s me.

I then got pregnant with my first daughter and had a terrific pregnancy. I can’t blame a huge gain on that, at all.  Nope, my problem was not losing much of it afterwards! I started a home daycare, which I then ran for the next 10+ years. In that time I also had my second daughter. The weight at this point had crept up to my highest weight ever.  I was miserable but just couldn’t seem to care enough to actually do anything about it.

Luckily for me, I have fantastic friends that started to kick my butt a little.  I joined a gym with a good friend who would come pick me up three times a week and off we’d go to the gym at 6am.  I’d follow her routine and watch my food intake more closely during the day, writing down what was going into my mouth. Slowly but surely the weight started to come off. When I say slowly, I truly mean SLOWLY.  My siblings and I joke about the horrendous metabolisms we’ve inherited. You know, joke through the tears and all of that. Ahem.

I got to a “better” weight but definitely not where I should be ideally. I’ve hovered around that weight, going up and down 10-15lbs depending on my emotional or life state, for the last 5 years or so.

Here I am today. I’m approximately a year and a half away from turning 40 and sick and tired of having weight and self-image hold me back.  I am done with going to the beach with my family but not wearing a bathing suit, or not swimming unless I have a tank top on like I’m ten again.  I’m done with not being in any single family photo because I hate the way I look in every one. I’m done with going out for a nice evening and fidgeting all night with my clothing because I feel self-conscious about how it’s clinging to parts where I’d rather it didn’t cling. I’m tired of not dressing in my true style because those clothes just wouldn’t look good on me.  I’m done feeling like I just have no control over this whole thing.

Losing weight to look good is one aspect of wanting to do this, of course.  If we say it isn’t, we’re all lying! However, with a family history of heart disease, it goes much deeper than just vanity.  I want to be around for a long, long time! I don’t want to be the Granny that can’t go on walks and hikes, can’t ride a bike, can’t keep up in general with her grandkids.  Nope, not for me. I have lots I want to do and see and I want health to be a priority.

I also have two daughters, and more than anything, I want them to see that while I’m trying to be the best Mom that I can be and that my family is truly my priority, part of that job is taking care of myself as well. I’ve forgotten that along the way, somewhere. It’s important to me that they know that you should eat well and be active every day and that looking good comes second to feeling good and being healthy.

In the next 8 weeks, I’m hoping to lose 15+lbs and to journal what I’m eating so that I can keep my eye on the prize. I signed up for my first ever Booty Camp Fitness classes, and I’ll be attending those 2x a week as well. My mindset is on health and lifestyle, once and for all. This has to be a new way of life-not a diet or a way to try to look smokin’ for some special event.

I’m seeking a new normal. I’m hoping you’ll all help me find it. I’m always open to advice, encouragement and with some goading-even trying new things! Don’t just read and follow me here-I relish you pushing and commenting and bringing insight and positivity!

I’m eager to get started, and look forward to having you all as my “team.”

LET’S DO THIS THING!

PS It was next to impossible to find a photo of myself to include in this introductory post! Just a testament again to how little I allow myself to be photographed!

I need my endorphin fix, so I make due and I find a way to get a good workout in at home.  Yes, the kids interrupt me and the dog licks my face, but I find a way to get my sweat on.  I have learned that I need this and when life gets in the way I find a way to make it work.

So I thought I would share one of my at home workouts that takes about 30-35 min to do depending on how often you get interrupted.  (This isn’t a beginner workout and it gets your heart rate climbing! So listen to your body, modify where you need to, I’ve included modifications, stop and march in place if you need to.  Use safe and proper form.  Be careful and safe. ) **this workout also relies heavily on putting your bodyweight in your wrists, so if you have an injury or weakness there this is not a good choice.

All you need for this workout is your yoga matt and set of  light dumbbells (I used 5 pounds as that’s all I have).  This is a circuit training style workout, with a strength exercise followed by a cardio interval. The cardio intervals I have selected are intermediate to advanced, you can substitue 1 minute of marching, high knees, jumping jacks, whatever gets your heart rate up safely. Also move through the exercises at your own pace, stop and rest if you need to.

Warm up: 2-3 minutes: for a warm up I like to go through a few sun salutations  from yoga, basically flowing from mountain pose, to plank, lowering slowly, to upward dog, to downward dog, and back to mountain.  I start slowly and then move a bit faster…flowing into the moves.  You can also march in place, do arm swings, torso twists, high knees etc.  The idea is to warm up your body and prepare it for exercise.

Push ups: From toes or knees, 10-12 (stop as soon as your form breaks down).  Rest in childs pose for 30 sec.  REPEAT for a total of 2 sets

Cardio Interval: Wood Chops for 1 minute (remember you can change this to any cardio exercise for 1 minute, listen YOUR body) *make sure your knees do not pass over your toes. 

Plank to push up with alternating dumbbell row: In plank position (holding dumbbells in hands) lower to push up and back up, then alterante a row on each side. This is one rep, do 6-10 reps, rest 30 sec and repeat.  (this is an intermediate to advanced move, a good modification is to do wide dumbbell rows, 15 reps of light weight, rest and repeat.)

Cardio Interval: 15-20 plyometric lunges, rest 10-15 sec, 20 more (you can substitute your choice of cardio for 1 minute)

One-Legged Dead Lift Balance: 12 per leg, rest and do 2 sets (the balance is tricky right after the cardio, with your heart pumping, so if need be march in pace till your HR comes down)  This exercise is a slow controlled one, its difficult, if need be keep back foot on floor.

Cardio Interval :  Squat Jumps 1 minute (if needed do 20 sec, rest 10, 20 sec on, rest 10) or choose a cardio interval that suits your body, be safe.

Good Old Fashioned Tricep Dips: find a bench, sturdy braced chair, or do them from the floor with your arms behind you and one leg raised. 10-12, 3 sets

Cardio Interval:  Flo Jo Sprints on the spot 1 min (oh man this one had me breathing hard!)  As Bob Harper would say “I love it when fit people start breathing like that!”

Russian Twists: do 20 rest for 15-30 sec and repeat (these are done without the medicine ball shown in the video) You can modify by keeping your feet on the floor.

Cardio Interval: Side crunch to burpee for 1 min (again you can choose to modify)

Downward dog leg lift to knee tuck: 10 per side x 2,  we are coming down now, transitioning to cool down.  Rest a few breaths on downward dog before switching legs, rest in child’s pose before doing the second set.  (if getting into downward dog is too much with your heart rate up from the burpees, rest in child’s pose first before inverting)

Cool down: 3-5 min, I like to go back to the sun salutations and move through them slowly until my heart rate returns to normal.

This is a fairly quick, power packed workout that will get the sweat pouring and the endorphins flowing.  Its something I like to do on days when we are confined to the house.  It gives me my “happy” back and I am a much better Nurse…wink.

They say we all need stress in our lives. It’s stress that will make you get up and run if ever you encounter a bear while walking in the woods or make you hit the brakes in sight of upcoming traffic. I also heard that stress is the greatest cause of people not feeling well now days. As all of you I am sure, I feel like my level of stress is too high and I wish it could go down a bit but I choose a career that is not considered relaxing and I have yet to figure out how to balance work and life.

Anxiety

Four years ago, I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. I have been treated and made great efforts to cope with the sometimes overwhelming feelings and thoughts I had. I had good days, very good days and quite bad days. Thought it all, I still managed to graduate from University, move to a foreign region and find love. Why am I telling all that pretty personal stuff on here? Well, as I stated here before, I also gained all the weight I intend to loose during that period of my life. I also stated before that I managed to get back the control of my head in 2011 and I feel like 2012 is my year.

On Tuesday morning, I went to the gym and got on the treadmill. After 18 minutes, I began feeling tired. My heart rate was a little high and I felt like panic was on its way. This had often happened to me before: as my heart rate was going up, my breathing gets heavier and it feels like I am having a panic attack. I told myself to calm down even if I had the feeling that the whole gym knew I wasn’t doing so well in my head. I struggled to get my workout done but I did finish it. I have not gone back to the gym yet but I will be there when you will read this post. What will happen then? I have a number of fears associated with the gym, but I will conquer them and go back, do my thing and be proud.

I guess I wanted to share this with you all because I need to get out of my chest the fact that I thought those panic attacks were behind me but there not. I know for a fact that exercise helps me reduce my stress level, but I still need to practice coping with the heavy breathing associated with cardio training and, ultimately, weight loss.

I also wanted to ask all of you if a situation like that have even happened to you and how you handeled it. Thanks!

I thought of all the times I have started down the healthy living path, and how I had failed beacuse of a self fulfiling prophecy: I was afraid I would fail.

I was afraid I would put in all sorts of work, and I would fail.

I was afraid I would lose the first 10 pounds or so, hit a plateau and not be able to go any further.

It wasn’t until I decided that failiure was not an option that I suceeded. I would not let myself fail.

Pre-weight loss, I had not ran any races, or even ran at all. With the exception of a little bit of yoga now and then, I hadn’t ver phisically active very much at all.

But now that I am not quite as afraid of failure as I used to be, now that I’ve accepted that taking risks always pay off, if not immediately then late down the road as it teaches you something I still find that I’m afraid to push myself. Especially when running and especially when I’m doing sped work.

Thos old days when I was afraid to push myself for fear of failing come flooding back when I try to push my speed. Eventhough I know I’ve lost some weight, I still sometimes see myself as the over weight girl I used to be who couldn’t run. I ran my first half marathon in September, and I was terrified! Those runners were fast! How could I ever keep up with them? Again, I didn’t give myself a chance to fail. I was going to run with them and I was going to keep up. And I did.

It took four half marathons for me to set my sights on a new goal of running a jfull marathon at Ottawa Race Weekend this year. Not to mention the fact that the marathon is exactly one week before I get married. To prepare myself I am training with the running room thre times a week, doing yoga on my “rest day”,  cross training two days a wek and running hills one day a week.

I have no time goals, I am running this one just to finish and prove to myself that I can do it. I’m going to push and not give up. I wil not let myself fail.

What do I want you to take away from this? Don’t be afraid to take a chance on yourself. You are worth it, and I’m pretty sure you will be pleasantly surprised. By the way, if you’r a runner just do the flippin speed work. It really does pay off.

On a side note, I am going to be running the marathon with Team Diabetes to raise funds for the Canadian Diabetes Association. I would greatly appreciate your sponsorship so please feel free to follow this link to sponsor me :https://ocp.diabetes.ca/Pledge/csPersonalPage.asp?prId=td&tId=18242&oId=14537903
Every little bit counts.

Next time: what I am doing to prevent weight gain and promote weight loss while trainning for the marathon.

So. Another new idea. I enlisted my former running buddy (to be running buddy again in the spring, since I’m just not hardcore enough yet for winter running) to come over after all our kidlets are in bed at least twice a week, and we are just going to do ab workouts. That’s it. Just 20 minutes of abs. I need to get this damn stomach down, and this is what I need to push me to git’er done. I just don’t do it on my own, so…hoping this will work. Then, I will have two Goodlife workouts a week, two ab workouts a week, volleyball and hockey. And the occasional walk/skate/snowshoe with my girls. That should be enough, with a few good food choices to make a difference, surely? We’ll see.

How have you adjusted and readjusted your routines? What finally worked for you? Do you still constantly rework your plans, or do you stick to something in particular?

And now, without further ado, Guacamole, the redux:

Food. I LOVE food. And so when my hubby and I come up with an amazing dinner, and something about it goes ‘POW’ in your mouth, I want to share.

Tonight, we made fajitas. It’s an ‘old standby’ in our house when we are looking for tasty but healthy. This was the view as I jammed these yummy suckers in my mouth…

The composition was as follows:

Marinated BBQ chicken breast
Sauteed red and green peppers with onion strips
whole wheat tortillas
low fat sour cream
salsa (this was homemade but whatever)
fresh cilantro
homemade guacamole
homemade ‘fajita’ special sauce

Here are the ‘recipes’.

Chicken marinade (1 or 2 hours):
Olive oil
garlic
salt and pepper
fresh-squeezed lime juice
fresh chopped cilantro

Guacamole:
2 ripe avocados
fresh-squeezed juice of 1/2-full lime (to taste – I put about 3/4 of a lime via a fancy press)
chopped red onion (maybe 1/4 cup or so)
1-2 tbsp salsa
sprinkle of salt
chopped fresh cilantro (a good amount – 1/4 cup or 1/3 cup)
*Mango – tonight I added finely chopped fresh mango. OMG good…about 1/4 cup

- mash it all together et voila!

Fajita ‘special’ sauce
(something my hubby tossed together this afternoon that I CANNOT recommend enough!) You can char all of this on a BBQ or roast under broil in an oven, like he did this afternoon.

1 fresh poblano pepper, roasted and de-skinned
1 fresh orange pepper, roasted and de-skinned
2 cloves garlic, roasted
1 habanero pepper, roasted and de-seeded
1/4 red onion, sliced and also roasted/sauteed

- combine all the above in blender with enough olive oil to blend into nice, thick saucy consistency. Add a dash of sugar and salt and about 1/2 tblsp of white vinegar. Ah…mazing.

At the beginning of 2011 I was the heaviest and unhealthiest I had ever been. I have been overweight almost all of my life, but it was in 2011 that I tipped the scales in a way that shocked me into action. How had I allowed myself to get this heavy? I’m aware of all of the health risks associated with being overweight, so why hadn’t I taken any action to help myself previous to that point? I was frustrated and angry with myself and yes ashamed at the fact that I had dug myself into this deep hole.

The changes I started to make last year were small but successful, meal planning, more activity, and simple goals. I realized that these changes I was making were not just about losing weight. It was achieving and maintaining a healthier life, my focus of dropping pounds morphed into being fit, not just slimmer. My eating habits got better as well; I curbed my snacking and replaced my salty and sweet treats with lower cal options.  I was shedding pounds; albeit at a slow rate and gaining confidence in myself. I was learning a whole new skills set that was going to set the tone for the rest of my life and it felt damn good.

With my small changes I developed a BIG love of Yoga.  I have to admit I was apprehensive to go to my first class, intimidated by all of the long, lean bodies around me, feeling like I was probably going to look like a fool in those poses.  It was love at first forward bend for me.  Yoga has taught me that it is ok to slow down, recharge and really focus on yourself; it’s not selfish but the healthy thing to do.  For those 60-90 minutes I am on my mat I’m entirely focused on breathing and the intentions I’ve set for the practice, leaving everything else outside of those studio doors. At the end of it, no matter how I walked into that room, I leave feeling accomplished, strong and capable of achieving anything I set my mind to. Who knew a little stretching and twisting could be so powerful?!

Through these changes I had great support from my husband to be (now husband), family and friends. This journey is difficult and without their support I don’t think I would have been able to make the life changes I have so far.  While starting to “lose it” I have rekindled some amazing friendships, ones that will remain strong throughout the years because of the bond built while shedding pounds and munching veggies. The greatest support that I’ve received is from others who are going through this journey as well. They understand all of the feelings of guilt when you skip a workout, the frustration when you kill yourself at the gym for a month and don’t see the scale budge. No one understands it like someone going through it as well.  It’s inspiring to follow others progress and cheer them on and offer support as they need it.

2011 was an amazing start to the rest of my life; I did not reach my overall weight loss goal but that is ok, and prior to last year I would have said that and still been actually feeling horrible that i had failed yet again. This year I really mean it. It is ok. I did the best I could do and achieved great things, some of that weight loss, some of that personal perspective, a better understanding of who I am and knowing that I am capable of achieving the healthy life I want.  I no longer rely on my “all or nothing” attitude and have stopped dwelling on the shortcomings from the past. I focus on the moment; putting all my energy into making this moment the best it can be. Of course there are bad days, even bad weeks and I fall off the path and get all turned around, but every time I get back on the path I find myself stronger and more determined to make this change last.

I still have over 100 pounds to lose, and in 2012 I will work my hardest to get closer to my goal. Last year it was all about learning and slowly starting to integrate it into my life.  This year is all about turning up the heat, applying everything I have learned, everything I love and pushing myself a little harder to reach my goals. There are going to be days that I dread going to the gym, days that I won’t plan my meals properly but that ok – I have my sights set on my target and I am going to get there.  There is something about this time of year that renews my determination and resolve, I am excited  to learn more, grow more and reach  more of my health and fitness goals.  This will be my best year.

Not like in the past where I’ve pushed myself to do something that I didn’t really want to do.

Not like when I dreamed of the perfect bikini body that my children have ensured that I will never have.

Not like when I get on the scale every morning and close my eyes waiting for a magical number to appear.

Today, it was bigger than that.

Today, I realized that if you treat yourself like an Athlete and you will become one.

It’s funny because I’ve known this for a long time. This was actually one of my tactics for getting through high school. As a teenager, I competed in equestrian events and dressage at the national level. I trained 6-7 times a week and often rode for several hours a day. I attended clinics with the top Grand Prix riders and soaked up every bit of wisdom that I could. I took the sport very seriously. There is nothing better for a teenage girl’s self-worth than knowing that she excels at something that requires so much discipline. That, and spending time with the horses of course.

I guess it’s easy to lose sight of these things as you get older. Once you’re out of the rigorous demands of school and into the ins and outs of the working world, the thought of lounging on the couch becomes much more appealing than a never ending commitment to exercise. When you do finally start to feel the guilt from watching 4 hours of TV every night, you hit the elliptical out of shame, not desire.

As some of you know, hubby and I have been following the Isagenix Cleanse for almost a year now. In the first 4 months I lost 40lbs by dietary changes alone. The most exercise I did was walk to pick up my daughter from daycare a few times. In June, I joined the gym. I may very well be the luckiest gal around since I got to work out with KATIE! every morning. I grew strong and fit. I accomplished fitness goals that I didn’t even know I had! Somehow, with all this fabulous exercise, my weight loss stopped.

Although, I thoroughly enjoyed my workouts, I also found comfort in staying at home if my gym partner couldn’t make it. I lacked the internal drive to get me there doing it for myself. When I returned to work at the beginning of the month after a year off on mat leave, I found myself struggling for motivation. I tried to plan out my workout schedule, keeping it light so I wouldn’t be overwhelmed. Unfortunately, that just gave me more room for excuses.

Today, that all changed.

Maybe I’m jumping the gun, but I think I’ve figured out what I’ve been doing wrong.  I believe that I have been UNDER scheduling myself. If there was a chance that I might go to the gym at night, I would skip it at lunch. Then when I got home, there would be a good reason why I should stay home – laundry, cleaning, kid time, veg time, and the list goes on. By 8pm I was so tired of making excuses for my own laziness. I was left with a feeling of lingering guilt and fear that my muscles would start to weaken.

In today’s epiphany I realized that I NEED to exercise. It is not something I should do a few times a week; it’s something I must do every single day. It is what keeps me sane, focused, and happy. It keeps me feeling strong and athletic. It releases me of guilt and provides me with endorphins. It reassures me that even if I am not losing weight, I am still doing everything right.

In my euphoria, I filled my calendar with commitments to exercise. Some days I even plan to work out twice a day. This way exercise is no longer a question of when, but rather a question of what and where. This just seems right to me. I guess I’m an all or nothing type of gal!

With this, I challenge you all to schedule a couple extra workouts this week. They don’t have to be long or hard. Heck, even a 15 minute workout DVD will do just fine.

Let’s up the ante this week and treat ourselves like athletes.

No one’s going to tell you otherwise.

Laura is a Marketer by day and Mom by night. She recently returned to the workforce after spending a year dedicated to losing weight and getting fit, and her new baby of course! Laura and her husband, Rob, write about their trials and tribulations with weight loss, parenting, and everything in between over at lalaland. 

Broiled haddock with carrots, broccoli and asparagus.

But feeling good about meeting them is another thing. I can be as diligent as anything, but if I don’t see that number going down, it sends me into a funk. I would like to learn to not let a number on a scale matter.

But in terms of goals I have actually been mostly on top of things the last couple of weeks. Well, first of all, two Mondays ago I severely injured my big toe and simply couldn’t go to the gym. Actually, the first day I couldn’t even go to work. But I gave it a few days, and then went to the pool. It was a bit tricky – sometimes I forgot and pointed my toes and that is what really hurts, but I managed it and enjoyed an hour of laps, plus an hour of walking that day. The next day I did a yoga class and was pretty much fine except a couple of positions I had to modify

Lovely chicken and tofu stir-fry with egg, red peppers, carrots, kale, garlic, onions and ginger. Soy sauce and oyster sauce for flavouring.

a bit. This Monday saw me heading back to the gym and I got on the elliptical and nearly died. Not from toe pain, from hard work. Man, that’s a tough machine! But I’m keeping it up, varying the forms of exercise so I don’t get bored, and I think most importantly, starting to make consistent head space for exercise.

In my last blog post, I didn’t talk about food and that is because truthfully, I was eating horribly. So I made it my goal in the past two weeks to get the eating back on track and I think I’ve been really successful. For the first few days, I had to really push through the evening sugar munchies but it’s gotten easier, although I still fight an impulse to munch every evening. Now I’m completely out of holiday mode and back to eating normally – healthy breakfast, healthy lunch, healthy snack, healthy dinner. Lots of water. No pop. Tons of fruits and vegetables. I

Tofu risotto with butternut squash, broccoli, kale, garlic and onions.

never count calories, but I do try to think “What is the maximum number of veggies I can fit into what I’m cooking?” I almost always modify recipes by adding a bunch of vegetables. I’m eating mostly homemade food – I ate out once, with friends last week, and then didn’t feel tempted by the treats when we went to the movies after.

Plus, because I knew I was going out and my dinner would be much lower in vegetables and fruits (and higher in calories!) than usual, I ate a good breakfast and lunch, both on the small side, both with mostly vegetables and protein. I think this is the best way to indulge guilt-free – do it rarely, and when you do, make sure you balance it out with healthy stuff.

Braised beef short-ribs with baked potato, broccoli, mushrooms.

Tale of the Scale

I’ve lost five pounds in the last two weeks. So I’d say that’s a success! Even eating the odd meal like this ——>

Last week I was at one of the latter types of appointments when I casually mentioned that I’m still snacking nightly on a peanut butter sandwich, usually just before bed. (I know, I know) . Cue horrified doctor number one. (Just to be clear, he was not insulting and I did not take offence to his comments; they tickled my funny bone.) ‘Oh, no! You shouldn’t be doing that, think of the carbs!’ ‘You should really just grab a handful of nuts, and try to do it a bit earlier in the evening.’  Good advice that I’m not yet following.

This week I was at the second part of my annual physical. One line of questioning centred around my exercise levels. I indicated that I did exercise when one of my friends managed to strong arm me into BootyCamp. At which point my doc’s head whipped around as she realized she had the crazy in the room with her. I did indicate that I could participate at a level that didn’t do the bad sort of hurting, but I’m not sure she was convinced. She may be booking an psych evaluation as we speak.

Thankfully I don’t have any doctor’s appointments for a while, because I’m seriously considering the Ottawa Spartan Race but I’m not sure they could handle hearing the news.

But perhaps the most interesting recent story I’ve seen is “The Fat Trap,” by Tara Parker-Pope, published in the New York Times on December 28, just in time to put a damper on your New Year’s resolutions. I think it’s worth a read. Even if you find fault with some of the data or some of the lines of argument contained within the story, Parker-Pope has gathered enough evidence to make a case that’s worth thinking about: we all know it’s damn hard to lose weight, but it’s so hard to keep it off that you can never stop trying. I will point out up front that toward the end of the article, Parker-Pope notes that many researchers question “whether losing weight more slowly would make it more sustainable than the fast weight loss often used in scientific studies,” which was actually my first question when I read about the dubious methods used to induce weight loss by some of these scientists. But keep reading.

Have you ever wondered whether the numbers lie? Calories-in/calories-out may not be a matter of simple math after all. If you eat 3500 extra calories, you are supposed to gain precisely one pound, and if you burn 3500 extra calories, you can lose it again. But Parker-Pope cites a Canadian study on twins that indicates that given the exact same diet and exercise, individuals may gain more or less weight due to their genetic predisposition, among other variables. One woman profiled in the story, Janice Bridge, has calculated “her own personal fuel efficiency” to demonstrate that her body does not burn the amount of calories it is supposed to (11 calories per minute of biking, for example). Even scientists have argued that you may think you are burning 200 calories during a thirty-minute walk, but you may actually be only burning 150–160; this is due to changes in muscle fibers that dieting can cause. In other words, your mileage may vary. I am actually relieved to see this in print because it chimes with my own experience, especially where exercise is concerned. For example, this is one reason why you may not be able to eat all your exercise calories or points, as many of us have found.

Parker-Pope also delves into the National Weight Control Registry, comprised of 10,000 people who have succeeded in maintaining their weight loss of at least thirty pounds for at least a year. Their habits seem to demonstrate what the new research indicates: “to lose weight and keep it off, a person must eat fewer calories and exercise far more than a person who maintains the same weight naturally.” In other words, let’s say I manage to get my weight down to 159 pounds, which is about the maximum that Weight Watchers prescribes for someone at my height. When I weigh 159 pounds, I will have to work to stay there, whereas someone who “naturally” weighs 159 pounds can eat more and exercise less than 159-pound-me will have to do in order to maintain that weight. I have no problem believing that. And if that naturally-occurring 159-pound woman ate as much cheese and drank as much wine as I would like, then she wouldn’t weight 159 pounds either! So let’s keep “work” in perspective. But in fact, there’s not much I’m doing now that I want or need to stop, ever – exercising more, drinking less alcohol, eating healthy food in healthy portions. I’ll admit that tracking is a bit of a pain, but it’s also become a habit, and without it, I know that I would eat less deliberately and make poorer decisions. I’m not trapped into making healthy choices for a lifetime; I’m choosing to be healthy for a lifetime. What is a bit harder to accept is how hard I am having to work to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight of 178 pounds, after topping out at 218. I’m afraid that the new 178-pound-me is going to have to eat less and exercise more than the old 178-pound-me had to, even though I had been approximately that same weight since high school. Researchers don’t know whether there is a window for losing temporary pounds easily, but I know that when I gain a few pounds due to travel or holidays, for example, they come off much more quickly than the pounds I already knew I had to lose. But I’m afraid that 42 weeks of pregnancy (in my case) plus multiple months post-baby (when maintaining sanity, not losing weight, was top priority) had already taken its toll before I began to lose the baby weight. In other words, my own experience predisposes me to accept Parker-Pope’s argument.

By the end of the story, though, I began to wonder what the tone of the piece would have felt like if a different author had approached the same data, both scientific and anecdotal. Parker-Pope seems to be exhausted by hearing about the effort that weight loss maintenance requires, but this is exactly what we mean when we talk about “lifestyle change” rather than diet. I also realized that I have begun to adopt some of the same habits as the members of the Weight Loss Registry she cites. For example, Lynn Haraldson “became a vegetarian, writes down what she eats everyday, exercises at least five days a week and blogs about the challenges of weight maintenance.” Well, the same could be said of Wordywort, except that I’ve been vegetarian for over twenty years, and I’m not maintaining . . . yet. But I would rather keep moving in that direction with my eyes open, intending to change not just my weight but my mindset (and, most importantly, my life expectancy), instead of daydreaming that someday I will be able to just go back to being normal, which is something that I never was to begin with.