Cindy – Motivation to Grieve and Learning From Pirate Pants

We lost our beloved Waggy Dog.  It wasn’t totally unexpected, he had been sick for a while, but it still hurts and the emptiness is still there.  I have been totally unmotivated.  I think this is depression.  I’ve been unmotivated to eat and unmotivated to workout.  That means that I just pick at whatever happens to be around, mostly crackers.  As for exercise, I haven’t wanted to do anything.  DH has been able to get rid of some of his frustration/anger/grief out on the treadmill, but I haven’t been able to do that.  The weights helped a little bit, but not enough.

I’d like to spend a day sitting in my bedroom trying to find his spirit to give it a good ear scratch, but that’s not going to happen.  But life has to go on for us and someone needs to keep Pirate Pants on track and I’ve been elected.

I’ve been watching Pirate Pants very carefully lately, making sure that his little world is not as horribly disrupted as mine and DH’s was and he seems to be coming through just fine.  Watching him that carefully and interacting with him so much I’ve started watching HOW he eats.  He takes a bite, chews, plays with a toy, solves a universal problem and then takes another bite and stops when he’s not hungry anymore.  Or maybe he just stops when he’s run out of the food he really likes because the peas seem to end up on the plate alone quite a lot.

So, to get more out of my food, I think I need to start taking a bite, finding a toy to play with, figure out a way to get world peace, then take another bite.  Unfortunately, I’m not sure if I have time in my day to solve the world peace problem – as if I would be heard if I actually did solve that problem.  I think I will start this challenge by eating slower, trying to match Pirate Pants chew for chew.

UPDATE – It’s the Sunday before my post is due.  We’re just back from the gym where we spent an hour on weights.  I needed that.  I think my mind needed it too.  No personal records, but it was an awesome workout just the same.  I’m not as depressed as I was when I started this post a two weeks ago but there is still a horrible lack of waggy-ness in the house.  Sigh.

I’ve decided that I need weight gloves – my hands were really hurting this week when I was lifting.  So I shall be off on adventure to get some this week.  I’ve also decided the reward for my next goal, which I still need to decide on, will be a personal trainer for a day.  Do you think Katie Squires would be willing to come to the East End of town?  I’ve heard good things about her.  ;-)

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3 Responses to Cindy – Motivation to Grieve and Learning From Pirate Pants

  1. So sorry to hear about your dog, we lost much loved wiener dog last year and it really is very sad isn’t it :(

  2. Karen F says:

    I’m so sorry to hear about Waggy Dog. It is very hard, I know. Keeping yourself busy is important I think. Where in the East end do you live? I’m in Orleans. Hugs and hang in there.

  3. Barbara says:

    I’m sorry for your loss. We’ve had our cats longer than our daughter. Losing one a coue of years ago was tough.

    It’s so hard to find the motivation to exercise some days, even when we know it’ll make us feel better to have done it. Exercise gives those happy endorphins but mourning gets in the way of movingn

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